News flash. There is more than one way to love people. Not everybody that crosses your path is supposed to be or going to be a romantic connection. Be aware of this if you look at things like that. There is no need to chase that or become fixated on that codependency. You WILL lose yourself. Go inward and access yourself in other possibilities with those that cross your path and watch how what is for you just comes in with ease. It might not be there to serve you in a romantic capacity! So escape the illusory pattern that you are putting in your own mind. Think about that. Consider that.

Men and women need to learn how to do platonic relationships better for starters and start getting along. Get out of your self-interest and lean in more toward your self-purpose. Do you know what that is? Do you know what it is that you are wanting to offer of yourself to the world and people around you? We are all very gifted with purpose. Show yourself in that righteousness and celebrate that shit.

We are here to serve one another in so many different capacities! I mean, are we adults here yet or what boys and girls? Surrender and let go. Get out of your head and your ego trying to force lower vibrational, rat race shit if you are feeling stuck. All that will do is create more set backs in whatever it is that you DON’T want. Dig deeper. Raise your awareness/vibration. This is what it means to do that. It isn’t cliche. Master yourself first. That is the only way you will have anything of meaning to offer the collective. Cultivate the interpersonal connections around you that come in . Establish friendships-not situationships. There is more than one way to love people.

I am saying this because fatal attraction killed the cat. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE romance, I do not think men are all pieces of shit or that all women are crazy. Both are conditioned behaviors. Choose and pave your path for something else.

I want all the ridiculously adorable love stuff. But I do inner work and have isolated myself in that to figure out who I am, what I want and what type of dynamics and ideals I want to put my energy into. For me, you can’t rush awesome. I know exactly what I want and am not budging on that romantically. It takes more than in and out, fly by night, instant gratification through self-indulgence on repeat or on a hamster wheel to penetrate the soul to something more beautiful and fulfilling.

I strongly sense that many people are in conflict romantically. I am not where I want to be in that sense but at least I have my arms wrapped around that in acceptance. It’s ok! Stop running from yourself to pass and fill your time with stuff that is ultimately meaningless to your bigger picture. Don’t play small time with yourself. You are not alone. Sit and be grateful for this time and for whatever lesson you are supposed to taking from the universe. Self-reflection leads to self-actualization. Exercise that and follow your own lead there and in that.

Hello there my fellow single ladies and gentlemen. I wanted to point something out here. There is more than one way to love people. Not everybody that crosses your path is supposed to be or going to be a romantic connection. Be aware of this if you look at things like that. It is basically a form of judgment and we should know better by now to not judge a book by its cover or judge anything at all for that matter.

Allow me to elaborate. If you find that you have any new person present or coming into your surroundings or vice versa, allow them to show you who they are and show them who you are. We shouldn’t be walking around with a magnifying glass trying to size people up upon first impression to either use or discard based on our own selfish needs. Just be yourself, coexist and allow people to be people. We shouldn’t idealize people or throw them up on pedestals for whatever our selfish perception of them is at first. That is so shallow and self-centered. Get rid of any knee-jerk preconceived notions or self-indulgent expectations of people. Look for substance. Look for exchange and reciprocity in whatever the connection is. And by that, I don’t mean try to look for faults. Identify what is good or different about them. Identify if they have strengths or positive attributes that you identify with.

I have an abundance in the quality of the relationships that I seek and because of that, I am left with nothing other than respect for myself and other people because what I seek is life lessons and longevity through people and in return, I like to share my lessons, victories and failures in an effort to school people on what I have picked up along the way. It’s called getting over yourself. Isn’t that why we are here? Get over yourself!

There is no need to chase an ideal or become fixated on nothing merely than a codependency in and through others. You WILL lose yourself. Understand that you are enough and you hold your own truth within. If you are into the instant gratification of superficial self-indulgence, trust that once the novelty of the shiny, new thing wears off, you will move on to the next thing because you have programmed yourself to not seek and sustain substance, sustenance and longevity to begin with. There is no real self-fulfillment in that. There is no identify found in that and it really lends itself to a meaningless, hopeless, uninspired and empty existence. And people wonder why they are lonely or can’t find love. Relax the straps a little bit folks. Just be. Live and let live. Find the authentic flow in that.

We are all just regular here and we are all human. I get turned off by anybody that idealizes me or puts me up on some pedestal without even really knowing me at first. That kind of thing is a bit overwhelming, blind, rushed and somewhat superficially judgmental. I can be a dominant, unapologetic, ever-changing, unpredictable, stubborn bear of a person at times and although I own who I am in that, those qualities are not always present at first glance and those same qualities surface at almost every circumstance in my life. It is who I am. That doesn’t resonate with everybody on a romantic level but I have formed great, compatible friendships or business partnersips instead. Going that route will actually leave you open, more self-assured and prepared for romance with the right person because now, you are mastering how to properly align yourself in your own strengths as well as the strengths of others and you are doing so responsibly rather than haphazardly.

Stand firm in who you are, embrace others for who they are and expect nothing. How people navigate interpersonal relationships can be so blatently transparent. Know what you want and stand up for your own beliefs and ideals. We are not supposed to be carbon copies of eachother. We are supposed to coexist and work with what we’ve got.

Go inward and access yourself in endless possibilities with the individuals that cross your path. React from there. Have no expectations. Instead, exclude no human possibility or standard from people and watch how things shake up in life. What is FOR you will simply come in with ease. People will surprise you. And again, they might not be there to serve you in a romantic capacity. Imagine that!

So, it is wise that you be aware of and escape the illusory, limiting pattern that you are putting in your own mind if you are doing that. Think about and consider that. You will progressively feel less conflicted in whatever your idea of love and romance is and you will stand more self-assured. I’m not a doctor or relationship guru. I have simply lived my life as honest as possible and am merely sharing my experience, perspective and what seems to have worked for me when I realized how codependent and empty I felt when not in a relationship or partnership. There was a reason why I was latching on to all of the wrong things and spent most of my life unhappy in long-term or committed relationships and why I found myself single and confused for the past four years. It is because I was not in proper alignment with people and I was lacking experience in interpersonal and/or healthy platonic relationships first. So rather than jump from one person to the next out of being impatient, hasty and ending up feeling disappointed and deflated on the instant gratification tip, I started passing time with myself and others differently.

Men and women need to learn how to do platonic relationships better for starters and start getting along and being friends. Get out of your self-interest and lean in more toward your self-purpose. Do you know what that is? Do you know what it is that you are wanting to offer of yourself to the world and people around you? We are all very gifted with purpose. Show yourself in that righteousness and celebrate that shit.

We are here to serve one another in so many different capacities! I mean, are we adults here yet or what boys and girls? Surrender and let go. Get out of your head and your ego trying to force lower vibrational, rat race shit if you are feeling stuck. All that will do is create more set backs in whatever it is that you DON’T want. Dig deeper. Raise your awareness/vibration. This is what it means to do that. It isn’t cliche. Master yourself first. That is the only way you will have anything of meaning to offer the collective. Cultivate the interpersonal connections around you that come in . Establish friendships-not situationships. There is more than one way to love people.

I am saying this because fatal attraction killed the cat. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE romance, I do not think men are all pieces of shit or that all women are crazy. Both are conditioned behaviors. Choose and pave your path for something else.

I want all the ridiculously adorable love stuff. But I do inner work and have isolated myself in that to figure out who I am, what I want and what type of dynamics and ideals I want to put my energy into. For me, you can’t rush awesome. I know exactly what I want and am not budging on that romantically. It takes more than in and out, fly by night, instant gratification through self-indulgence on repeat or on a hamster wheel to penetrate the soul to something more beautiful and fulfilling.

I strongly sense that many people are experiencing conflict romantically or in love. I am not where I want to be in that sense but I have my arms wrapped around that circumstance in acceptance. It’s ok! Stop running from yourself to pass and fill your time with things that are ultimately meaningless to your bigger picture. Don’t play small time with yourself. You are not alone. Sit and be grateful for this time and for whatever lesson you are supposed to taking from the universe. Self-reflection leads to self-actualization. Exercise that like a muscle and follow your own lead there and in that.

DEPTH PERCEPTION

Remember folks: HELLO EVERYBODY! IT IS WHITE GIRL DAY! In honor of white girl day, celebrate in BEING YOURSELF. Don’t know how?? Allow me to give you an example right here off the cuff. I know. I KNOW. I am thee WORST and belong in a straight jacket. I am the crazy one. Per usual. Blah blah blah. How bout ANYWAYS comma.

You ever see a “shapeshifter” (commonly referred to as shapeshiftEE by MEEEE)? because I have ZERO desire to “jump” into or be anybody else in their body. It is so invasively obvious. THAT WOULD BE SO GROSS and retarded of me to want to detach from myself like that because I like ME the most. LOL. Shapeshifter. The most inaccurate, ridiculous, childish, uneducated term reference I’ve ever heard.

You ever see a LIFE SOURCE RESOURCE “witch bitch shapeshifting devil WORSTHipper” see RED BEFORE?? See it here FIRST. That’s me ya’ll. That is what happens when the TRUTH UNFOLDED isn’t what I wanted to hear. I said with the school sith.

I captured a moment in history for me. The first day I ever saw RED RED.

I had a really bad night last night. Real bad guys. It wasn’t pretty. My energy was so REAL that inanimate objects were flying around the house in my pent up agression, rage and fury because you can’t always get what you want. Right?

My children’s father was trembling seeing me in thought I was going to hurt or kill myself. I AIN’T GOING OUT LIKE THAT EVER. JUST TO CLARIFY THAT. I am not crazy. It’s not me. It’s PEOPLE that do this to me. PEOPLE should show THEIR TRUE COLORS. Not MINE. Seeing this photograph TODAY, made it worse. You should’ve seen them AFTER my episode of hell mania ensued. It definitely wasn’t white girl day.

It would scare the devil himself. I had to calm down enough from a sadistic swelling of emotional behavior and some serious waterworks of sorrow, tears and feeling like literal life source was being sucked out of me. My energy was on EXTRA AT 100. I literally felt LIFE SOURCE leaving me at this moment. I paused long enough to breathe, focus and put my period on ALL CAPS. Don’t believe me? I’ll betcha my BOTTOM DOLLAR UNDER PRESSURE. And this bitch don’t lie. She ain’t wrong either.

Let’s call this one SPECTACULAR PERCEPTIVE DEPTH APPEAL at your service.

Yeah yeah I know. I am weird

Call It What You Want. I Still Call It Love.

Being consistent in conviction rather than wishy washy is where I am at and where I have always been. If I say you are my friend, or that I love you, etc. I mean it. And I will sit there through the worst of times with you too. Not just the good times. I have done this with people that frankly did not deserve what I have to offer in heart to them. I am ok with that.

In situations where most people are too fragile and give up, I do not give up and I never want to be the one to throw the towel in first over things that I know are temporary situations (which is almost EVERYTHING). I am forward thinking. I like solutions. However, my integrity, allegiance and loyalty is to myself anymore. And that is mainly because most people are simply too fragile because they are not convicted in better self beliefs of their own. And when they are not, they take everything personal because their self importance is measured by external things rather than their own good qualities that they have to offer. Perhaps they struggle to identify with or find anything good about themselves so they constantly look to fill a void from sources outside themselves. They are either co-dependent on another person for false sense of security OR look to blame another person and point fingers for anything wrong in their life or relationships rather than reflecting inward. I don’t know. But I would never measure the fine attributes that I posess based on anybody else’s lack of conviction with me or their wishy washy, selfish tendencies. That is because I own and am very well aware of my own endeavors, boundaries, my own truth, what I stand for, what I stand in and what I must do to continually find and be all of that. And so I do. There is no time for anything else.

Intelligence of the Heart

Some understanding and knowing can only be gained by emotional maturity and intelligence of the heart through experiences of the heart. Dare you go there. That is where it’s at. This knowledge is found when you sift, feel through and take action based on that rough, tough, beautiful stuff that makes you who you are in the relationship that you have with yourself. Understand that we are meant to go through all of these things as a means to level up in love. Understand that love can take form in so many things and in so many ways. But ultimately, love is derived from your source within.

The process of operating from the heart rather than the mind isn’t easy but it is worth it. You can see everything there is to know from that vantage point. It is your job to identify what you see and use your own discernment to either build on that or make some changes. If you are on that path of discovery, I commend you. It takes courage and removing yourself from ego, expectations and attachments to false ideals that are placed upon us from sources outside of ourselves. Letting go of those things is necessary if you are trying to get honest and aligned with your own heart. In doing this, there is so much joy and love to be had in life. Remember, it is a journey-not a destination.

Truth In and Out of Love

I am so grateful to have the type of co-parenting relationship that I do with my children’s father. We met when we were 23 (now 39) and we were together/married for 13 years. We were together our entire adult lives pretty much. We grew up and did everything together. We accomplished so many life milestones together. We crushed so many goals. But somewhere in there, we grew apart and just didn’t see eye to eye anymore. Love got lost in the rat race of the life routine we were in. I finally learned that what I was living was not fulfilling to me. The romance ship sailed. It sunk. It was so depressing. In fact, it was catastrophic and debilitating to me.

Long story short, we parted 4 years ago for good. Things were difficult to adjust to over the past 4 years for both of us and for our kids. However, things for us individually have gotten so much better. We are better friends now than I think we ever have been and as a result, our children are so happy. He is a good man and a good father and he supports me and has my back no matter where I am at and what I am doing and that is because he is one of the few on this earth that has learned and knows my worth and has seen me in action as a human being and wants me to be happy. He trusts that what I say and what I do is what it is. And I want him to be happy and be where he wants to be just the same.

I am so lucky to have this. It hasn’t always been like this but we were able to get here out of getting brutally honest with ourselves and with eachother regarding the matter of life and where we each stood in it and what we each wanted out of it. Now, there is no “work” or effort involved because we can just be who we are with no “masks” involved. We started out with other plans but then life happened. We learned to accept that. I walked away from that with some priceless, lifelong lessons and have no regrets. If nothing else, I gained a better sense of who I am and accepted that people can grow apart.

Operating out of honesty isn’t always easy but it is so worth it. Staying true to you is always worth it and how it should be in my opinion. There is so much uncertainty in the future but I at least know that I am exactly where I am supposed to be and that at any given time, my next course of action is 100% my choice and up to nobody else but myself. I look inward to save myself anymore. It is nobody else’s job or responsibility to make me happy. That key belongs to me. This is certainly not a bad place to be at all. It definitely makes dating take on a whole new meaning for whenever that time comes. For that, I am grateful. I have not lost anything. I gained a lifelong friend, our kids are so blessed to have the type of truth that they will learn through us and I wouldn’t have it any other way. It is the better way of life than either of us were taught and I look at it as a means to an end of toxic cycles and conditioning patterns that were handed down to us.

We took something that was broken and are making it work in a different way. One thing I have always been good at is adapting to change and making the best of it. There is more than one way to teach our children. I lead with being imperfect because it is honest and it is how people really are. I am not afraid to expose it. My children will be more well-rounded, adjusted, honest, prepared and resilient in the world because of it. To anybody reading this, if this resonates with you, I wanted to offer a different perspective coming from somebody with an unflinching hopeful disposition and non-traditional views.